psyching myself up (and a disclaimer)

well, now that this week's podcast of RADIO CITY OF LEGENDS is well and put to bed, I get to celebrate the fact that next week I have set the bar impossibly high for an event that will likely be a defining moment for my year, until my beloved daughter Peri marries this really nice guy she met in LA ...those Valentine's Day podcasts.

I don't resent this challenge...I'm rested, rosined and ready...and I perform my best under pressure (you're talking to the man without sanity, here...I once walked into a crack house and retrieved an heirloom a lover gave to a drug dealer as collateral on her pills...I lead a perversely charmed existence...and I know it).

I just know what a bar I have set...I intentionally picked a broad swath of truly first-shelf works for the readings and I've charged myself with nothing less than a sincerely ragnarockian(!?!) take-no-prisoners attitude to the production. I've kicked off most of the rust of the last years, now it is time to shine. take it up a magnitude or ten. find that alchemistic, hypergolic, big-bang amomancy and make a moment that, if I should step in front of a bus a day ot two later, there will still be a bend in time and space with my name on it.

gee...that's not so much to ask, is it?

Just remember...it is better to burn out than fade away.

better still to burn up in an event horizon inverted into a glory of blazing creation.

Hmmm...maybe Peri is right and I should be on meds*.

But then, who would have eyes for the truth and a tongue and pen to present it?

*Disclaimer. I am flesh and blood, I'm just lucky that I have a knack for wordsmithing and have had the love and support of a few people along the road who nurtured it. Am I a god? No. Am I a prophet? No. Am I a holy man? Very unlikely. I do not believe I am any of these things. I'm just a talented writer who has found his path. I don't hurt people, I'm not a criminal, I don't do drugs or alcohol or even tobacco. I'm celibate (for at least the next week or so...two years, who would've thought it possible?). I believe in God and am opposed to violence, war and untruths of all form. I have a temper, but I've largely held it for decades. I've never had a mental health professional who has actually examined or evaluated me declare me mentally ill...I'm fine, really. And rising.