Does Alabama need a Poetry Coach?

I was going to comment on the current identity issue surrounding Jaz, but decided not to, as I think she should be flattered that there are people who covet her status.

I was going to do a bit on National Poetry Month, reminding people I am open to discuss possible appearances and readings this spring during that month. That can wait.

But, I really wanted to remind the media that we are having a poetry and CD launch party this coming Thursday in Fairmont, West Virginia, for the new books (RONIN in the TEMPLE OF APHRODITE and PSALMS of the MONSTER RIVER CULT) and the new CDs (NEMICORN and THE NAKED READS).

I am going to be there...so is my co-conspirator on "PSALMS", the inestimable Daniel S. McTaggart, author of MIDNIGHT MUSE in a CONVENIENCE STORE. The cover model for "RONIN", Sarah Chadwick, will not be able to attend, owing to a previous commitment. But we will have performances of works, a playing of the CDs and books and CDs for sale and discussion. But, of course, if the University of Alabama offers me $2 million dollars and jobs for my entire entourage to come be their poetry team coach, I might change my plans.

What? Alabama doesn't have a poetry team coach? But they are an institution of higher learning! I thought all institutions of higher learning put the arts and education ahead of grey-market alumni-funded sporting events. Wow. So you mean the football programs don't pay for themselves? What about the expense to the state and local governments for traffic control and zoning variances and law enforcement and canceling Veterans Day Parades (like Morgantown did for WVU this year)?

What? You mean there are people who consider football more important than poetry, community policing, traffic regulations, the convenience of local residents, public sobriety, the virtue of their daughters and the celebration of sacrifices and service Veterans and string quartets? Wow. We should make sure those sickos don't get power or they'll destroy the educational system in this country...

Hold it, there's a knock at my door...

Hey, it's the NCAA hit squad...ack! Run! Run! (sound of gunfire)...

Honestly, good people of West Virginia, stop getting so worked up over the possible defection of Coach Rich "I will finish my career at WVU" Rodriguez. If you held the politicians you claim to love to the same standard of steadfastness, you'd have to impeach the current administration.

Which, in and of itself is a not-so-bad idea.