This just in...
Phonecasting.com has just asked and received permission to include the poet's podcasts on their site.
He shared with me a new song, entitled "Oyarsa". He is doing a redesign of his website this weekend.
The momentum builds. And not a moment too soon. I know the sense of isolation, of alienation, that he is feeling is ripping him apart. It's fueling some great work...but it is like saying a forest fire is good for the forest...it isn't.
I worry about the man. Everyday he grapples with his demons of self-doubt, lost love and his own mortality. He is living his poem "The Last Crusade" with a brutal verve.
I doubt his physical immortality, his indestructibility, which he jokingly invokes when encouraged to slow down, to relax, to recenter himself. He is in a constant state of desperate self-doubt. He is waiting to see his path, alone in a darkness and a silence that may yet consume him. He has saved so many hearts and minds and lives, and yet, in the end, he will not be able to save himself...unless he is more than even I believe him to be.
LA undid him. There is a despair in him now, a despair he seeks to fill with the remnants of lost passions, terrified of finding new ones.
4 comments:
E.J., I thought LA reinvigorated him. Is it a case of the light that burned too bright?
I think he is now hungry again, and in the absence of what he needs here, is catabolizing (sp?) himself. It's like a hungry man, who doesn't realize how hungry he is until he smells food. He's amped up beyond belief, his level of production is like the Goldenheart era on steroids. But he's also reporting physical symptoms that are usually manifestations of stress, for him. Add to that the monastic life he's been devoted to now for almost three years (who thought it would be possible from the God of Sex?) and he's got to be suffering.
I don't think he really cares anymore that he burns so bright that he flares out.
As to his monastic life, it isnt as if we (the feminine collective) aren t interested in the poet...in case you had not noticed, he tends to be very dense, and actually shys away from contact sometimes!
I did consider applying a 2 x 4 to his head to get his attention...:)
I wish I knew who said that...
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